CHANGING WHINING BEHAVIOR

When children whine, they are generally trying to get your attention. They have learned that whining can make you give in and give them what they want. This may be a learned behavior that works well with you and other adults. Here are some tips to help children stop whining and find a better way to communicate their needs.

Talk with the child and let them know that whining is not going to work. There are few ways to do this.

1. Acknowledge the child’s age and how they have grown up. For example: say, “You are four years old now and I love to hear your ideas.”

2. Consistently, don’t respond to whining. For example: say, “I can’t understand you when you whine. Can you talk to me in a normal voice?”

3. Do not give the child attention when they whine. Consistently walk away when child is whining.

4. As soon as the child uses their normal voice, respond right away. Example: You might say, “Thank you for using your normal voice, now I know what you want.”

5. Give a visual cue. For example: cover your ears and say, “Your whining really hurts my ears. Can you talk in a normal voice?” Do this each time the child whines.

6. Practice and role play the difference between whining and using a normal voice.

7. Identify the times during your day where the child whines.

8. Do not use a whining voice yourself. Children will follow your example.

Discuss with your childcare provider your plan to stop the whining behavior. Let them know the procedures you are using and request that they do the same when with the child. Consistency from all the adults that care for the child is key in changing whining behavior.

We all know behaviors don’t develop overnight, so curbing the whining can take days and even weeks to remediate. However, with a little patience, practice, and consistency, you’ll help the child kick this habit in no time.