ASSISTING VS ENABLING
Often you are called on to assist a client. Assistance involves helping someone, or coming to their aid. You do this when a client needs to learn to do something.
For example, your client is not very comfortable with computers, She asks you to submit the menus for her at the end of the month. At the end of the first month, you sit down with her and show her how to do it. When she requests that you submit them the second month, you sit with her and have her submit the menus with your help. By the third month provider is able to submit them by herself.
ASSISTING is helping a person do something they should be able to do by themselves. Assisting another person allows them to learn and move on.
ENABLING involves you doing something that the client should learn to do by themselves. You may be asked to assist a client in dealing with a difficult parent or child.
For example: A provider calls you with a problem she is having with a parent that is chronically late in picking up her child. The provider asks you to talk to the parent. You call the parent and tell her that her child care subsidy could be cut off it she does not come to pick up the child during the subsidized hours of care. For a few weeks the parent is on time and then slowly slips back coming to pick up her child later and later. The provider asks you to call the parent again. You tell the provider that she needs to learn to talk to the parent herself and set down her rules. The provider complains that the parent does not listen to her. You know that the parent will listen to you, so you take over the job of calling the parent each time she comes late. The provider is soon asking you to handle any issue or problem she has with a parent, because you are so good at it. The provider’s responsibility now becomes your responsibility.
There may be times when you need to intervene to handle a difficult situation, but your assistance should be temporary, with the goal of teaching the client to become proficient enough to do it by themselves.
Enabling another person keeps them stagnant and stops their progression. Therefore you are not helping a client If they are relying on you to fulfill part of their responsibility.
Your job should be to train your clients to be able to carry out their responsibilities on their own. If you are concerned that you may be enabling a client ask yourself these questions:
1. How hard is the client working to be able to carry out their responsibility on their own?
2. Are my actions helping my client to become proficient or are they holding her/him back?
3. Do I feel sorry for my client?
4. What are my motives for continuing to carry out the provider’s responsibility?
Reflecting on these questions will help you to determine the best way to teach the provider to handle their business on their own.