DEVELOPMENTAL EXPECTATION – SOCIALIZATION
As a family childcare provider, you have a main role of facilitating appropriate social skills in the children in your program. A key objective of your program should be to assist the children in their social development. Therefore, what you should expect at each age and how you can facilitate good socialization are two questions that we will discuss in this fact sheet.
THREE -YEAR -OLD CHILDREN
Children at age three are becoming less egocentric and more aware of the people around them. They also are becoming more independent and less dependent on you. At this age they are developing a sense of their own identity. They begin to interact more and play with other children. Most children at age three can be expected to:
• Want to have friends
• Begin to share toys and take turns
• Want to help and please
• Enjoy imaginary play
• Imitate parents and friends.
• Show affection for familiar family and friends.
• Understands the idea of "mine" and "his/hers"
• Show a wide range of emotions, such as being sad, angry, happy, or bored.
A provider can assist the development of these social benchmarks by:
• Providing a large amount of time for informal play
• Reinforcing children when they do share
• Giving opportunities to help the provider, such as setting the table
• Providing dress-up clothes and props that will encourage imaginary play
FOUR -YEAR -OLD CHILDREN
Children at age four are starting to develop a unique, recognizable personality. They get along well with other children and love to play. They are developing an extensive vocabulary and experiment with many new words. Most four-year-old children can be expected to:
• Show emotional extremes
• Demonstrate they ‘love’ one minute and ‘hate’ the next
• Show fears
• Be bold, adventurous, and sure of themselves
• Be highly imaginative
• Start tattling
• Be bossy
• Tell silly jokes
• Begin to tell lies to get out of trouble
• Have imaginary friends
A provider can assist in the development of these social benchmarks by:
• Showing understanding
• Demonstrating patience
• Offering reassurance
• Offering new challenges and praising the child’s efforts
• Use creative movement
• Encourage children to make up ‘pretend stories”
FIVE-YEAR-OLD CHILDREN
Five-year-old children are exploring friendships and social play. Their vocabulary, and physical coordination have developed and improved. Most five-year-old children can be expected to:
• Conform to the group and follow rules
• Become involved with imaginary play
• Want to please adults
• Want to be independent
A provider can assist in the development of these social benchmarks by:
• Having children participate in the development of group rules
• Supply a variety of costumes, hats, and other objects for role playing
• Set up areas to roleplay such as housekeeping, restaurant, Dr office, nursery etc.
• Have outdoor imaginative play areas such sand area, table and chairs, playhouse etc.
• Acknowledge and praise positive behavior
Remember that children will develop at their own pace. Each child is unique. However here are a few red flags that may show a child is struggling with healthy social development.
THREE-YEAR-OLD CHILD
• Doesn’t understand simple instructions.
• Doesn’t speak in sentences.
• Doesn’t make eye contact.
• Doesn’t play pretend or make-believe.
• Doesn’t want to play with other children or with toys.
• Loses skills he once had.
FOUR-YEAR-OLD CHILDREN
• Shows no interest in interactive games or make-believe.
• Ignores other children or doesn’t respond to people outside the family.
• Doesn’t follow three-part commands.
FIVE-YEAR-OLD CHILDREN
• Doesn’t show a wide range of emotions.
• Shows extreme behavior such as unusually fearful, aggressive, shy or sad.
• Unusually withdrawn and not active.
• Doesn’t respond to people or responds only superficially.
• Can't tell what’s real and what’s make-believe.
• Doesn’t play a variety of games and activities.
As we have stated, children develop differently and at their own pace. If you notice a child in your care who is displaying any of the above red flags, don’t jump to conclusions or ‘diagnose’ the child yourself. Be sensitive to the parent when telling them of your observations. You want to approach this conversation positively. Many parent’s already feel guilty about leaving their child and could misinterpret what you are saying:
For example: They may feel you are telling them there is something wrong with their child and it is their fault. Instead, simply use facts. For example: use a preschool assessment tool and show the parent what you have observed. Be positive. Tell them something positive about their child, For example: “Bobby loves to build with blocks and he is able to build quite a few layers. But he could use some help with…….. You should consult with your pediatrician for some assistance. We want to make sure he is ready for school."
As a childcare provider, you can be proud of providing a safe, warm, caring group environment where children can develop healthy social skills.
Resources
Helpmegrowmn.org
Webmed.com